Monday, November 22, 2010

burned out

NaNoWriMo has got me by the balls. I have hit a serious & very high & thick wall. I reached 20K words, but no more are coming. I'm lacking inspiration. I'm lacking direction. I'm distracted (see previous post about George, plus I've had a majorly huge dog training test looming over me).

I'm just stuck, which has me feeling totally (and unnecessarily) stressed out. Bottom line: I don't think I'm going to hit my 50K by end of the month & that totally sucks because I feel, just by saying that, I've officially given up. I mean, there's just NO WAY I'm going to whip out 30,000 words over the next 7 days...just NO BLOODY WAY. And I'm accepting that...slowly but surely.

I mean 20,000 words is still more than I've EVER written in my entire life...well not entire, collective life (which makes me wonder--how many words collectively have I written during my 39.5 years on earth? but that's another post), but it IS the most I've written for a particular writing assignment. So I guess I should be proud of that--and I am. And the novel isn't dead--I still want to see it through--it's just obviously not going to be born via NaNoWriMo 2010!

I'm definitely bummed & feeling uber defeated. But you know what? I don't feel stressed out anymore & that's a nice little weight off my shoulders!



  1. Can I tell you off? Lady, you wrote 20k words. 20K!!!!!! Don't focus on the stuff that you didn't do but focus on the stuff you DID! You wrote 20k words on top of a full time shop, dog training stuff and whatever else goes on in your life.

    Love you, but this had to be said. Slap yourself on the shoulder. If you wrote 20K every month, then you'd have a novel in no time.

  2. I know, I know...geez, people are really laying into me on this! I hear it alot, but never realize how hard on myself I am. I guess it's so engrained that I just don't hear it like that as it's coming out.

    I am proud of the 20K...I'm proud that I even started/attempted a novel-length writing. And yes, I will focus on that part & that part alone!!! Thanks for the reality check!

  3. I'm with Mel on this one--you did, and are STILL doing fantastic, wall or not. Grow some longer arms, pat yourself on the back, and continue being awesome.

  4. Yeah, you can be so proud fo yourself. It's a stepping stone towards those 50k, and remember that Nanowrimo is about strating and keep writing more than finishing. You now have a lot of material, you know you can put writing in your life despite the distractions, isn't it great?
    Plus good luck with your exam. x

  5. HI-found you through Brady. I think that you are doing a great job and it gives me energy to look at all you are accomplishing! Want some ideas? How about 30 pounds of yellow ginko leaves in the yard that form a perfect volleyball court? It's an act of God!

    How about burnt french fries that you eat anyway, and how cool ketchup feels with that nasty hot crunch?

    So keep going! You can do it!
    Andrea Weis

  6. Thanks for stopping by & commenting Andrea. Love me some Brady! :)

  7. Were you able to hammer some stuff out over the holiday? I hope so, but either way--hold your head high and keep on keeping on.....

  8. Anon, no I have not put any more words down. Between my found-dog George, Thanksgiving, and a day trip to Austin, I'm finding it hard to focus on the writing. But I will add to those 20K words in December. I did do alittle art over the weekend...will post some pics in progress.