Thursday, October 22, 2009


awesome sculpture (sadly I've no idea what it's called)
Birmingham, England by me 2009

OK, I feel like I've been a bit negative on here lately & that's something I want to do my best to stay away from. I don't want this to be a forum for bitching or moaning or grumbling--that forum is already 24/7/365 in my brain. Truth is I tend toward the glass-is-half-empty perspective of life & it's something I'm definitely working to get.away.from in my everyday & definitely on this blog & as part of my year of living creatively. I'm not just hard on myself--I can be downright brutual with myself--when people get a glimpse at this they are actually shocked at how ugly & pervasive it really is.

This creative journey is about silencing the negative reel-to-reel that is on perpetual loop in my brain (if that's even possible with an old school reel-to-reel player, but you get the idea) and instead giving space & permission for the positive messages that I want to re-record in there.

I am nervous about measuring up to the other artists at the show next Sunday, but I too have a right to be there & have my worked honored. I do wish my life was more in line with my daydreams, but my life is still good as it is and I'm grateful to be where I am in my journey. I do feel a bit lost & random & restless most of the time, but thru it, I am searching & seeking & learning & growing and how wonderful is that in & of itself?

So I want to be more gentle....with myself, with my process, and with my dreams.


1 comment:

  1. I wish I would know the name of that sculpture but I have no idea.

    I hope the art show is going to go great for you. Being nicer to yourself is a process. So don't start beating yourself up when you are not nice to yourself.

    How about starting to compliment yourself on 1 thing a day. Every day. Just one thing. For a month. Make a really big deal out of it.

    When I started doing this I would go: Wow, Melanie, you did the washing up, how cool is that. The kitchen looks awesome now.... I wrote it in my journal as well and before you know it you are thinking more than once a day that you did something great.