Tuesday, October 20, 2009

romanticizing

(me in 40 yrs?) Bridge North, England, by me 2009

I was relaying a daydream to a girlfriend today & she said "the change in weather always makes me romanticize things." I must romanticize all the time...the daydream I was having was specific, but not unusual for me. I dream of a different life on many levels & while I'm sure we all do, I think I internalize it beyond the romance stage & expect that it should be as I dream it in my head. The trouble is that I think I berate myself a bit for not making it so.

The daydream today was this: I'm outfitted in my favorite pea coat with a bright knitted scarf & fun fingerless gloves. Walking around Bridge North or Bath England on a crisp morning, cameras in tote, I spend the morning snapping pics of interesting architecture, gardens, and quirky people along the way. I stop at an outdoor cafe to have some hot tea and a cigarette and take my laptop out to jot down a tale that I will later send out for publication. From there I return to my cute, light & airy flat to prepare some packages for shipping from my online art shop & then rustle up a spicey stew & mashed tatties while I wait for my cute & charming British boyfriend Nigel/Ian/Malcolm to come over for dinner. We sit on the couch, under a shared blanket, to watch trashy East Enders telly and talk about our days.

door in Bridge North, England, by me 2009
love the circular glass cutouts they had everywhere


It doesn't sound sooooo unrealistic, does it? Not so unachievable in the grand scheme of life. It's not like I've got myself living in some massive French chateu or spending the day doing something extravagant and deluxe or jetting here, there & yon. My daydreams are always so doable that I tend to get subconsiously mad at myself for not doing it. And then I wonder: am I dreaming my dream or romanticizing myself out of my life?!

xoxo!

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