Sunday, October 25, 2009

who, what, when, where am I???

self-explanatory, London 2009 (by me)

I've got so much I want to do, so many ideas, desires, interests. Now that I've gotten my 8-9 pieces squared away for the art show next weekend (is that even enough pieces I keep asking?), I can feel other urges vying for my attention. I saw a notice of an online writing course I've been wanting to take, which starts in January. Trouble is, I was already eyeing a sort of self-improvement course during that same time that I was hoping to take as well. Nothing says I can't do them simultaneously, but something is saying I'm better when I can focus on one thing at a time.

The assemblage work has been consuming my extra attention latley. But then of course, there are the 2 cameras I ordered that I'm still waiting to get delivered that have been gnawing at my interest from an anticipated distance as well. Each time I get an idea or a wiff of an interest, I feel that's the right one at the time. So when I read about the writing course, my nerves perked up. In fact, I stirred in bed all night half dreaming about writing, interested, excited, as if it was a reminder that that's still brewing below the surface too.

I feel a bit pulled, torn almost--what to focus on when. In addition to the things on my so-called plate like the assemblage & writing (as imaginary as it might be at times), there's also the pending to-do's: the jewelry, the photography, the knitting/sewing/felting, languages, yoga, metal, glass, collage, furniture, 1001 diy's & 515 books & magazines & websites on any/none of the above....I mean, ask me what I'm most interested in & it could vary with the day of the week.

Makes me feel a bit schizophrenic, especially on top of: the day job, the housework, the disorganization, the exercising and health seeking, the friendshipping, the dog walking, errand running, bill paying, and pay day praying. Oh and wait, and what about that thing I hear stories about called dating...right, how could I forget about the loneliness & isolation & desocialization now firmly planted in the leftover crevices of my life?

Breathe...Trust...Let go.


No comments:

Post a Comment