Sunday, December 6, 2009

joy, how you allude me

Well what started out as a promising day on Saturday, turned on me as usual. The spark of morning energy was good...I pulled down the Christmas boxes from the attic, turned on some fun, traditional Christmas tunes, and set about decorating my little 4' tree (the same one I've had since my first year in college...20 years ago...eek.). I was in a good place...

And then it. just. all. stopped! Not sure if my CFS kicked in, or if an IM conversation with a certain someone overseas put me off, or if I ate something that brought my system down (too many gluten-free, sugar-free, dairy-free cupcakes). But I was a lousy mess of laziness the entire remainder of the day. I watched countless hours of random telly...including close to 10 hrs of The Good Wife (which is really good by the way). And by 2:00 I was already starting to feel the depressin of stewing in my own lethargy on such a lovely day (something I'm unfortuantely not all that unfamiliar with). I even texted a friend about maybe getting out that night, going bowling actually, in an attempt to circumvent myself to do some thing. But later I recanted, as there was no way I was up for doing anything, let alone getting out & about.'s so frustrating & rather baffling. And today I still have a bit of a hangover of it all & am not starting the day off with much enthusiasm, esp with the grey skies outside to greet me. After struggling w/ this up & down nonsense for the better part of the last 2 years, I'm beginning to think that joy insists on alluding me.



  1. That's a real shame. Your post yesterday seemed so full of energy and hope that i had really high hopes for you. I hope you turn it around today and have a great one, despite the gloomy day.

  2. Awww, thanks's a new day, I'll give it another try!